4 ways to build your own friend circle
Making friends like an adult can almost time warp you back to PE in school, waiting to be chosen for a team sport. Now it’s, waiting to be chosen for the group chat, the dinner, playdate, or the weekend plans. The problem with this is that you’re outsourcing your social life to other people. You don’t have to find an established friend group to try to get into, you can simply build your own by choosing people you genuinely enjoy. You just need to be wiling to make the first move.
Here are 4 things you can start this weekend towards building your own friend circle:
Stop waiting for someone else to choose you.
Choose one person that you enjoy their company and reach out to them, making a specific plan. A simple:
“It’s always so nice when we get to chat. Do you want to go for a walk after drop off this week or next?’
Turn individual friendships into a circle
Stop looking for groups to audition for. Instead, invite 2 or 3 friends you like to do something together. A simple:
“I think you two would really like each other. Want to grab lunch one day this month or next?”
Make the first invitation incredibly easy to accept too.
Don’t begin with a themed dinner as the first get together. A simple walk is incredibly low pressure. A simple:
“I’m going on a walk on Friday, want to join?”
Even if they say no the first time, keep inviting 1 or 2 more times.
One declined invite doesn’t mean they’re not interested. But if you’re the one that’s only ever initiating and they never bother to suggest another time, stop overinvesting and look for someone that does meet you halfway.
Your final takeaway:
You don’t need to keep looking for the right group to let you in. You really can just build your own!
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xo,
Dr. C